Gillian's Story
“I never thought stroke could happen to me — I thought it was something that only happened to older people. But at just 30 years old, my life changed in an instant when I had a a massive stroke. I had to relearn to walk, talk and swallow.
“I wouldn’t be where I am today without Northern Ireland Chest Heart & Stroke — and without people who support them. When you give to NICHS, your donation really does change lives. It funds real services for real people in communities across Northern Ireland – people like me.”
I’ll never forget that date - the 5th of June 2021.
It was an ordinary Saturday morning. I had a terrible headache that just wouldn’t go away. It got so bad I called an ambulance, but I collapsed before it arrived. I was rushed first to Craigavon hospital, but my case was so severe that I had to be blue lighted onwards to the Royal Victoria Hospital in Belfast.
Little did I know I had suffered a massive brainstem stroke caused by something called an AVM which I was born with but never knew I had. It could have burst at any time - and it just so happened that day was when it finally happened. I went through hours of brain surgery and have a huge scar on my head to show for it.
I spent weeks in a coma. At one stage, doctors even talked about turning off my life support. It was terrifying for my partner Gordon and my family. I always say it was far harder on him than on me at that stage, because at least I had no idea what was happening – he had to experience it all.
When I finally woke up, I was on so much medication that at first, I didn’t really know what was real and what was a dream – it was all very fuzzy. But as time went on, I realised I had woken up to a nightmare. The impact of the stroke was massive. I couldn’t speak or eat at all and as I’d had a tracheostomy, I’d lost the ability to swallow. I had to relearn almost everything, including how to walk. Even then, I didn’t realise that the effects were permanent. I thought I would recover quickly and things would go back to normal. I never in a million years thought it would be another nine months before I even stepped foot in my home again.
I spent six months in the Regional Acquired Brain Injury Unit at Musgrave Park Hospital. The team were brilliant, but it was intense. I had physio every day, and worked to relearn how to do simple, everyday things like using a washing machine, things I would need to do in the real world. Before my stroke, I was working for a mortgage broker, dealing with paperwork, but now I had to relearn how to even use a keyboard as part of my rehab. I’ve always been an independent, and hardworking person, and never would have pictured myself in a position where I would struggle to do things for myself. It was tough, physically and mentally. Christmas that year was filled with uncertainty and fear – what would the year ahead bring?
After I completed my rehab, I was placed in a care home as there was no care package in place for me. Imagine how that felt, at just 30 years old, to be in an old people’s home?
Finally, on the 30th June 2022, over a year since my stroke and after going through so much, I was able to go home. But life was far from how it had been when I left. I was in a wheelchair, still dealing with speech issues, fatigue, and weakness in my left hand and right leg. The worst part was people treating me differently. One of the biggest challenges was stopping myself from being rude to people – so many times I have wanted to say I haven’t suddenly become stupid or deaf you know!
Then, Northern Ireland Chest Heart and Stroke came into my life. Lynne and Julie from NICHS visited me and Gordon at home as part of their Family Support Service. It was invaluable to have someone to support you who understands stroke, and has all the advice and knowledge to answer your questions. They listened, they understood, and most importantly — they gave me hope.
I joined NICHS’s Post Rehab Exercise Programme (PREP), which is a rehab programme for stroke survivors. At the start, I came in my wheelchair and couldn’t do many of the exercises. However I made progress every week, and by the end, I had managed to take on all the exercises.
I also took part in NICHS’s Taking Control Programme and I now attend their regular Stroke Wellness Sessions in Craigavon. Their programmes gave me the opportunity to meet others who totally understand what I’m going through, and see me for me, not my stroke. I’ve made so many friends, it’s great craic, and means I have ongoing support from the NICHS team. I think you can talk about your stroke all you wanted, but it takes talking to someone in the same boat for you to feel understood. NICHS gave me that.
Slowly, things changed, and moments of hope began to reappear. At first, I had to be lifted into the car. Now, I can get in myself. When I walked in with my rollator for the first time, the whole group cheered. That encouragement meant the world to me.
And the best moment of all? On 25th July this year, I married my wonderful partner Gordon, and had the strength to walk down the aisle. I planned it all myself and it was a beautiful day from start to finish.
I wouldn’t be where I am today without Northern Ireland Chest Heart and Stroke — and without people like you who support them. When you give to NICHS, your donation really does change lives. It funds real services for real people in communities across Northern Ireland – people like me.
I’ve come so far from when my journey began, and I credit my positive, determined attitude, my faith, and the help of NICHS. I still use a wheelchair for longer distances, but I can walk short distances with my rollator. I’ve even got back to my passion for baking, making treats for my church coffee shop. My days are full, and I never think there’s anything I can’t do – only the question of how I can find a way to do it.
In our darkest days when Gordon was there next to me in hospital while I was deep in a coma, when I was pushing myself through gruelling rehab every day, and when I was counting the days until I could go home, hope for the future seemed almost impossible.
But today, we are looking forward to celebrating our first Christmas as husband and wife, and the future looks brighter.
Thank you for giving the Gift of Hope this Christmas.
Gillian’s story shows how our services — funded by supporters like you — give hope and help rebuild lives. Today, Gillian is thriving as part of our Craigavon Wellness Group. But I know that without Family Support at the right time, her story – and Gordon’s – might have been very different.
- Lynn McIlroy, Care Services Co-ordinator at NICHS
I’ve worked at Northern Ireland Chest Heart & Stroke for over 23 years as a Care Services Co-ordinator. In that time, I’ve seen just how extraordinary our Family Support Service can be.
But we simply can’t be there to provide life-changing services without donations, which make up almost 90% of our income. There are co-ordinators like me in every county of Northern Ireland, ready to step in and support – and a donation from you this Christmas will ensure we can stay on the ground and reach as many families as possible who desperately need us.
Sadly, Gillian and Gordon are not alone. Last year, 2,807 families benefitted from our Family Support Service across Northern Ireland. A typical home visit lasts two hours and by the end of it, families are left more reassured and given a personalised advice and support plan to enable them to navigate a new, more hopeful future.
This Christmas, will you give the gift of hope to another family facing life after a chest, heart, or stroke illness? Without your help, too many families will be left to cope alone.
